When fate is kind (Steve x Reader) One shot

4^th of July, New York – At a club celebrating Steve’s birthday

Music was blasting through the speakers of a club and the melody pounded in Steve’s head, signaling him it was way passed timed to go. He had followed his friends around all evening. He couldn’t say he disliked spending time with them, but after the restaurant, the bar, the shawarma joint and this club, he was ready to go to bed. Not that he expected to get much sleep. He hadn’t in a very long time.

    The super soldier quickly emptied his glass and told the others he was going home, though of course, they could stay if they wanted to.

    “Oh, come on,” Tony exclaimed. “It’s the 4^th of July. You’re not seriously going to mope around the compound again, are you? It’s your birthday for crying out loud!”

    “Relax, Stark,” Natasha padded him on the back. “Just because Cap is going home doesn’t mean we have to, right?”

    “Right…”

    “I’m sorry, Tony. There are a few… things I need to take care of.”

    “You need any help?” Sam asked the Captain worriedly, knowing his friend wasn’t leaving because there was something important going on at the compound, but rather because he wanted to be alone.

    “No, I’m fine. Thanks, Sam. Goodnight, guys.”

    “Bye,” everyone said in unison, watching the super soldier walk away from them, going back to the Avengers compound to spend the rest of his birthday alone.

    Steve made his way through the packed club, softly pushing some of the people dancing in front of him out of the way. He appreciated the effort his friends had made to make him have a good time, but a club like this – with music and dance moves he still didn’t understand – was more Tony’s thing than it would ever be his.

    “Hey, watch it!” it suddenly sounded beside him as he pushed his way further towards the exit.

    “I’m sorry,” Steve quickly apologized, turning his gaze towards the girl beside him. You looked at him angrily, wiping what must have been the contains of your glass from your shirt. “I didn’t see you.”

    “No shit Captain Obvious…” you whispered, a loud sigh escaping your lips.

    “I’m really sorry. I’ll pay for a new drink.”

    The expression on your face softened and you shook your head slowly. “Don’t worry about it. I didn’t like it anyway.”

    “Please, I insist.”

    “You’re persistent, aren’t you?” you laughed softly. “It’s fine, really. I was leaving anyway. Too much noise,” you continued loudly, trying to get him to hear you over the music.

    “Are you sure?”

    You nodded. “I was headed outside. My subway leaves in… ten minutes,” you said, looking at the watch around your wrist. “Shit, I should really be going.”

    “Let me at least walk you there.”

    There was an indecisive frown on your brow for a moment, until eventually, you nodded at his words. “If you must.”

    Together you made your way out of the busy club, Steve making sure no one else bumped into you as you pushed your way through the crowd. You waved goodbye at some of the people that you passed and Steve couldn’t help but notice the looks they gave each other once they realized he was by your side. A sigh filled his lungs. Even though he had never liked how invisible he was before the super soldier serum, he had never truly been able to get used to all the attention he got now either.

    “The subway station is that way,” you said, waking the captain from his train of thought. You pointed to the crossing on the left and waited until he followed into your step. “So, tell me,” you continued, “why is Captain America going home early on his own birthday?”

    Steve laughed softly, knowing it was too much to ask for you not to recognize him. Some days he missed the animosity the city used to give him. “It’s been a long day,” he replied. It wasn’t a complete lie, he had been busy all day, but it wasn’t the complete truth either. “I could use some peace and quiet.”

    “I understand. I guess the 4^th of July isn’t the best of birthdays when you’re Captain America.”

    “Well, it isn’t all that bad. I mean, there’s the fireworks. That’s nice.”

    You smiled at that, nodding at his words. “What about a cake? I bet you had the biggest cake in America, if not the world.”

    Steve swallowed hard, evading his eyes from you. He hadn’t really given it much thought, but now that you mentioned it, he realized he hadn’t had a single slice of cake. Sam had bought him a present – a CD with some music he ought to check out – and Natasha had brought him a muffin, but Tony had eaten it before Steve could even think about doing the same. At the restaurant, they had given him an extra-large cone of ice cream, but no cake. He had gone through an entire birthday without any cake.

    “Wait,” you said, stopping him before you crossed the street together. The super soldier hadn’t realized he had paused so long before answering. “You did get a birthday cake, right?”

    “Well…”

    “You’ve got to be kidding me. You haven’t had any cake yet?” You looked down at the watch on your wrist again and sighed. “Come on,” you said, taking his hand in yours and pulling him towards the other side of the crossing and into a small restaurant that was still open despite the time of night. When you pulled him further inside it became clear they were already closing up. “Josh,” you yelled towards the back, ignoring the waiters that were stacking the chairs on top of each other on the terrace and carrying them inside. “Josh,” you yelled again, slamming your hand on the bar.

    “What?” it sounded from within the kitchen. A tall, broad-shouldered man appeared from the back, polishing a wine glass with a cloth. “[Name]?” the man sounded surprised. He looked at the clock behind him and frowned. “I thought you had already left.”

    “Yeah, well, you know how those things go. I still have some time. This is Steve,” you said, turning your back from the super soldier so he could properly be introduced. “Captain, this is Josh. My boss, well… ex-boss technically.”

    “Hey,” the man smiled kindly, shaking Steve’s hand. “It’s an honor to meet you.”

    Steve nodded, returning the pleasantries. “It’s a nice restaurant you have,” he said, looking around him.

    “Thank you, we try our best… So, what can I do for you two?”

    “You don’t happen to have some leftover cream cake, do you? It’s Steve’s birthday and he hasn’t had any yet.”

    “No cake on your birthday?” Josh frowned, turning from you to the captain. “Well, that can easily be fixed. There should be two or three slices in the fridge. I was going to take them home to the misses, but she gets enough leftovers as it is. You know the way,” he winked at you, continuing his work of polishing the glasses.

    “Thanks, Josh,” you yelled after him, nudging Steve to follow you towards the fridge behind the bar. Two slices of perfect cake were sitting on the middle plateau on separate plates and you got two forks from behind the bar to eat them with. You asked Steve to take one of the plates with him as you did the same and opened one of the doors in the back of the restaurant, revealing a steep staircase leading up towards a small roof terrace. “We’re up top!” you yelled down, though Steve doubted anyone heard it.

    The terrace was small but cozy and the outlook over the streets of New York was beautiful. The Avenger’s Headquarters was too quiet for Steve’s liking, but standing here, looking over the familiar streets of Brooklyn with the wind blowing through his hair, he felt at home.

    “It’s good cake,” you said, stuffing a large forkful of the cream cake into your mouth. You put the plate down on the stone railing of the terrace and took in a deep breath. “Gosh, I’m going to miss this place.”

    Steve took a bite as well, the taste of the fluffy cake and soft, sweet cream, making him sigh too. “Miss it? You’re leaving?”

    You nodded, swallowing hard. “Yeah, I finished my Masters a few months ago and got offered a job out of the country. I’m leaving tomorrow morning.”

    “Wow, congratulations.”

    “Thank you. For a while, I thought I would forever be a waitress, but sometimes fate is kind.”

    He nodded. “Well, I wish you to best of luck.”

    “Thanks,” you said again, a smile curling your lips. “It’s been a tough choice, leaving everything behind, but I guess life takes you to places you least expect.”

    “I guess it does,” Steve agreed, looking from you back towards the view of New York. “Thank you for this,” he continued after a while, holding up the cake. “It’s really good.”

    “No problem. I couldn’t let you go home without it. On your birthday, you deserve a cake.”

    “I really appreciate it. Especially since you clearly have better things to do. I even spilled your drink.”

    “Well, it’s not every day I get to spend some time with Captain America. And don’t worry about the drink, Steve. I had even forgotten about it.”

    “I just feel I owe you double now,” the super soldier said, taking another bite of the delicious cake. Even though he had wanted to be alone when he had walked out of the club merely half an hour ago, he was enjoying your company.

    You laughed, shaking your head. “Don’t be silly. To be honest, I didn’t want to be alone for my last few hours in New York anyway. So, if anything, you’re doing me a favor.” You put another piece of cake into your mouth and sighed again.

    “In that case; you’re welcome,” Steve smiled, following your example and leaning with his elbows on the stone railing of the terrace. He was always so busy with being Captain America – being an Avenger – that he rarely had any time to stop and think about things. To take a breath and relax. Though, tonight, with you, he felt more relaxed than he had ever been. Or could remember at least.

     

Steve’s birthday lasted for another hour. The cake only a few minutes. The conversation, however, didn’t stop until dawn and you reluctantly told him you really had to go. He offered to walk you towards the subway station again and you agreed before the words had all left his lips.

    You talked some more on the way there, but with each step closer the super soldier started to realize he didn’t want this night – turning into a day – to end. His pace slowed, hoping to delay the inevitable moment of goodbye. If you noticed, you didn’t say anything. Though the thoughtful frown on your face told him you were thinking about it as well.

    “[Name],” Steve said when you were only a street away from the subway station. He grabbed your hand, making you stop and turn to him “I don’t want–”

     “Don’t…” you swallowed hard, evading your eyes from him. “I know what you’re going to say, but please don’t. You seem like a great guy, Steve, and I had a wonderful time tonight, but I’m leaving New York today. I don’t want to get involved with someone.”

    “I know. I’m not trying to make you stay. That would be selfish of me,” he nodded, making you look at him again. “But after tonight I don’t think I can just let you go… I–I mean,” he sighed, seeing the confused frown on your face. “We can stay in touch, right? If you give me your number, we could–”

    “I don’t think that’s such a good idea…”

    “Why not?”

    “Because I’d fall in love with you and eventually I’d want to come back… I can’t do that, Steve. I’m sorry.”

    He nodded. He understood. He really did, but that didn’t make him stop wondering why that would be such a bad thing. Was it so bad to love him? You seemed to read his mind and your jaw tensed, taking in a deep breath.

    “You are a great guy, Steve. If things would have been different, if I wasn’t leaving in a few hours, I would have given you my number in a heartbeat. I would have even waited for your call all day, all week if I had to…”

    “I understand.” That was a lie, though to be honest, he didn’t think he hid it very well. His disappointment was infused within his voice.

    “Do you believe in fate?” you suddenly said, waking him from his thoughts.

    “What?”

    “Alright, the subway station is about a minute walk away, right?” you continued, pointing at the large M on the other side of the street. “I’ll go in and pick a random line and one of the stops. All you have to do is pick the same line and get out at the same stop.”

    “And then what?”

    “Then I’ll give you my number.”

    Hope flared in Steve’s chest. Though it was quickly quenched when he realized the chances of getting on the same subway line and getting off at the same stop – the right stop – was small. “But how do I know which one you picked, let alone where you chose to step off.”

    “Well, I guess that’s up to fate, isn’t it?” you smiled shortly. “If the universe wants us to be together, she’ll show you the way.”

    “Wait… The universe?” Steve frowned, watching you walk away from him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

    “It means: Have a little faith, captain,” you said, before disappearing into the subway station, leaving Steve alone to think about what you had said.

    He cursed – something he rarely did – and rubbed his eyes. He had pictured this conversation to go very differently in his head. All night he had known this moment would come and for some reason, he had been convinced he’d been able to get your number, at least. Now he was standing here empty-handed. The only slight shimmer of hope he had of ever speaking to you again, was the subway station in front of him.

    He sighed, knowing he would have to ask the Gods for help again. Since they had been so kind to him the last time he’d wanted something - someone - he didn’t have much faith at all.

    When the super soldier thought enough time had passed for your test to work, he ran across the street and down the stairs leading towards the platforms. He didn’t allow himself much time to think and bought a ticket to the fourth train that would arrive. Maybe it was because the fourth was also his birthday or because it had taken him the last four years to start to have feelings for another woman again. Either way, he waited ten whole minutes on the platform to the utter left side of the station.

    He had almost forgotten about getting off at one at the stops when he had already missed two of them. On a whim he got out on the third, not seeing the large group of people that had gathered at the end of the platform, near the escalators.

    “What’s going on?” he asked the woman before him, feeling the nerves rise in his chest.

    “Something’s wrong with the exit gates,” she explained. “They stopped working a few minutes ago.”

    Steve let out a short breath and clenched his teeth, trying to find another exit up to street level. In the corner of his eyes, he saw the next subway arriving behind him. He knew he was cheating if he took another line to another stop, but he wasn’t taking any chances. Not today.

    He sprinted back into the train. He tried to control his nerves, but his foot wouldn’t stop tapping the floor until the doors opened again. This platform was completely empty, though at least several minutes away from his original choice. He pushed his nails into the palm of his hand and started running again, taking several steps of stairs at that same time as he made his way up.

    When he arrived at street level, the sun was slowly rising towards the horizon, spreading a warm glow of orange passed the large buildings. His eyes searched the streets, but there was no sign of you. He decided very quickly that you must be at the other station he had wanted to step off at first. He felt more determined than ever when he started running back, hoping – praying wordlessly – that he’d be on time.

    It took him longer than he had expected. Even though he had grown up in New York, he wasn’t as familiar with the streets now as he had been before. He had to turn back a few times, though eventually found the station he was looking for. Sweat was pouring down his neck into his shirt, but none of that bothered Steve as long as he was on time to stop you from leaving.

    “[Name]!” he yelled, thinking he saw you crossing the street. He followed your example and caught your hand just as you turned the corner. “I made it,” he panted.

    Your eyes shifted over his face, tracing the trails of sweat that covered his temples. “Did you run all the way?”

    “No, there was a problem at this stop,” he managed to say in between breaths. “I had to improvise.”

    You nodded, pulling your hand from his sweaty palm. “Well, it doesn’t really matter I guess.”

    “What do you mean?”

    “I waited for over half an hour, Steve,” you sighed. “I think that’s the universe telling us we should go our separate ways.”

    Now it was his time to nod, though he barely registered the meaning of your words. This couldn’t be the end. It just couldn’t. Not now he knew he had chosen the right line and the right stop. He was at the right spot. He just wasn’t on time. Again.

    He clenched his teeth together and swallowed hard. “Maybe, but I think the universe owes me a favor.”

    You smiled, shaking your head. “I bet she does, but I can’t stay. I’m leaving in a few hours for my new job. I–I just can’t. I’m sorry, Steve. I really am. Maybe, when fate is kind, we’ll meet again.”

    “When fate is kind,” he repeated, letting the words linger on his lips. They tasted bittersweet and even though he didn’t want to let you go, your hand still slowly slipped from his. Eventually, he watched you walked away from him, now without any hope for seeing you again.

    He had lost.

    Again.

    That, out of everything, was even more bittersweet.

     

     

     

Wakanda – Several months later after the events of Civil War

 “[Name], come on!” your colleague called out to you. “Don’t you want to see what’s going on?”

    You nodded, though barely looked up from the computer screen before you. The whole facility was in an uproar after a jet had landed on the roof and no one was willing to tell you what was going on. Above all T’Challa – the newly crowned king of Wakanda – had arrived as well, sending everyone home that wasn’t needed. You had to admit that it was a strange occurrence, but stranger things had happened in your time as one of the researchers, so this didn’t really surprise you. You had better things to do anyway.

    “I’m just finishing up this report,” you mumbled, softly biting down on the end of a pen as you scrolled through your latest research about the effects of stress on memory recall and the fabrication of false memories. Your findings were truly fascinating. “I’ll be right there.”

    “There’s more to life than work, you know,” your colleague shook her head. “Suit yourself” she sighed eventually, resigning herself to the fact you weren’t coming with her.

    Whatever was happening, you were sure she’d tell you about it in detail tomorrow. So there wasn’t really a need for you to go check it out.

    While you were rereading the report you had written, a message popped up on your screen. Your eyes involuntarily focused on the little screen in the right corner of your computer and for a moment your heart sank. It was about Steve again. All the news items these past few days had been about the super soldier and each time you saw his name pop up on your computer, you couldn’t stop yourself from thinking about that one night you had spent with him.

    Every time your mind wandered off and remembered what you tried to forget. The way the light reached his eyes when he smiled at you. The way the right side of his lips would curl up just a little more than the left each time he hid. The way he tried to hide the doubt he felt talking to you, knowing he was failing.

    At first, all of that had overwhelmed you. You had cursed yourself for leaving like you had. Why in the world hadn’t you just given him your number? Though as the days started to string together and you proved yourself a valuable asset to the research team, you realized you had made the right choice. Staying in contact with Steve would have only distracted you from your work. It would have made you feel devastated that you were all the way in Wakanda and he was far, far away in New York. It would have torn you apart emotionally.

    Not that it was easy now. Thinking about him alone made your stomach flutter. Knowing that he was in trouble and you couldn’t help him, was a bitter pill to take.

    A soft sigh escaped your lips as you realized you had read the same sentence at least a dozen times without really registering it. You rubbed your eyes. It was time to get away from the blue computer screen you had been sitting behind all day. You pushed yourself from your seat and started to make your way out of your joined office. Another hour had passed with you reading your research and being absorbed in thought about Steve. The excitement in the facility had died down, but now it was unusually quiet in the hallways.

    It wasn’t until you heard someone say your name that you realized almost everyone had gone home.

    “Miss [Last Name] is our best researcher when it comes to memory recollection and conditioning. I am certain she will be able to help Bucky.”

    You didn’t hear the reaction T’Challa’s companion gave him, but you could see two shadows approaching from around the corner. You quickly brushed your fingers through your hair, hoping neither of them would notice the dark circles underneath your eyes. When the two men appeared down the hall, you realized it didn’t matter how good or bad you looked. He looked much, much worse.

    Steve walked towards you together with the king of Wakanda. T’Challa had already seen you, smiling kindly, but the super soldier’s gaze was still turned to the floor, a pained, yet thoughtful frown covering his brow.

    “Ah, [Name], we were just on our way to you.”

    When Steve heard your name he finally looked up, his eyes shifting between T’Challa and you. For a moment your eyes met and your confusion and sudden nerves were reflected in his blue orbs.

    “[Name]?” he frowned, his eyes going over your face as if seeing you for the first time.

    “Steve..” you swallowed hard, his name lingering on your lips. You didn’t know what else to say. Your heart was beating violently in your chest and you couldn’t help but think about the last words you had spoken to each other before you had left.

    When fate is kind…

    And today, here in the middle of Wakanda surrounded by nothing but trees and trees of the jungle, maybe it was.

    “You know each other?” T’Challa asked, looking at the both of you. Confusion flickered through his eyes, but if he noticed the tension between you and Steve, he didn’t say anything about it.

    You couldn’t help but smile as both you and the super soldier nodded at his words. Maybe the universe did owe Steve a favor. You could only wonder as to why he was here. It was a question that didn’t come to your mind again until you remembered the news items you had read the past few days and saw the bruises on his face.

    “We do,” you cleared your throat, answering for the both of you. “We met… before I came here,” you mumbled, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks under Steve’s intense gaze. You knew in that one look that he had been thinking about the same things you just had. “What’s going on? What happened?” you asked, turning your attention to Steve. You had to restrain yourself from walking up to him and brushing your fingers against the yellow purplish stains on his face.

    “It’s a long story,” he said, though it almost sounded like a whisper. You could hear the pain and sorrow in his voice and your heart ached for him. You could only imagine what he had been through.

    T’Challa still seemed confused beside the super soldier and eventually decided it was probably for the best if he left you alone. “Perhaps it is best if you brief Miss [Last Name] yourself,” he stated. “I will make sure she gets access to all resources needed. I will be in my office if you need me,” he finished, wishing you both a good evening before leaving you alone to talk.

    “Steve, I–” you started. At the same time the captain spoke as well and for a moment you both laughed, taking a step forward and closing the space between you.

    “It’s good to see you,” Steve spoke eventually.

    You nodded, agreeing with him. “What are you doing here? Are you alright?” you asked, several more questions shooting through your mind.

    “I’m fine. It’s been a long week. T’Challa offered to help me fix things… Fix Bucky.”

    “So it’s true?”

    “That depends on what you heard…”

    “You’re a wanted criminal.”

    He laughed at those words, though the smile curling his lips never reached his eyes. “So I’ve been told… But it will be alright,” he said, though he didn’t seem completely convinced by his own words. “I’ve got you to help me.”

    You smiled at that. “Whatever you need,” you nodded. “Steve… I–I’m sorry about what happened that night.”

    “It’s okay,” he brushed it off. “It was probably for the best. With everything that happened the past week…”

    “What did happen?”

    Steve sighed, shortly rubbing his eyes. “Like I said: it’s a long story.”

    “I’ve got the time,” you tried to put him at ease.

    He hesitated at first, though soon started to tell the story of what happened in Lagos, how that – and everything else – had led to the Sokovia Accords. How a man named Zemo had been able to convince the whole world Bucky was responsible for the bombing in Vienna and how Steve trying to help his friend had steamrolled into one catastrophe after another.

    You listened to him in silence. During the story you had walked onto the large balcony of the facility, looking out over the jungle of Wakanda. A warm breeze blew through your hair, spreading the smell of the trees around you.

    “Anyway,” Steve said, finishing his story. “That’s why I’m here. It’s too dangerous for Bucky out there. If he’s ever to have a normal life I – we – need to get the Winter Soldier conditioning out of his head.”

    “That’s where I come in, I guess. I will be honest, Steve, getting the conditioning from his mind isn’t as easy as it sounds. Especially not without knowing how it got there in the first place. But I will try. The best I can,” you promised him.

    “I know. You being here make it a little better,” he smiled shortly, turning his gaze from the jungle back to you. His eyes shot to the watch on his wrist and he sighed again. “I have to go.”

    “Already?” you asked, trying to hide your disappointment, though probably failing miserably.

    “Yes, I’m sorry. There are a few things I need to take care of.”

    “I understand,” you nodded, though you couldn’t help yourself from feeling your heart sink. The universe had brought you together again only to pull you right back apart. Maybe fate wasn’t so kind after all.

    “But I’ll be back. I don’t know when exactly, but I’ll be back.”

    Hope flared in your chest again. “I’d like that.”

    Steve smiled. The first real smile he had given you in the past hour you had spent together. His eyes shifted over your face and in that moment the strain on his face disappeared and relief flashed through his eyes. You wanted to tell him you wished you hadn’t rejected him that night at the subway. That you had just been scared to fall even deeper in love with him and throw everything you had worked for away just to hold on to those few fleeting moments. But none of that came past your lips. Not because you didn’t try. No.

    Because Steve had closed the small space between you and had taken you into his arms. His lips now rested on yours in a desperate kiss. A kiss several months overdue.

    You let out a hot breath, feeling his hands trail down your back. You didn’t want him to leave. At least not just yet. But you knew, just like he had then, that he had to go. His friends were counting on him. And he wasn’t the kind of person to let them down. That, among other things, was something you admired about him.

    “So,” Steve said, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. You could feel their soft skin lingering on your own and a shiver went down your spine. “Are you going to give me your number now?”